The Momming Journey

What Did I Do Wrong? A Reminder in the Struggle

My Post (40)

No one likes to be disappointed, especially when you’ve worked so hard and wanted something for so long.  We are taught as children that anyone can be or do whatever he or she wants to do, as long as he or she works hard for it.  And this is still very true.  Most people who have achieved so much in their lifetime, worked extremely hard for it, often sacrificing other things or opportunities so that they could achieve their dreams.  But what happens when things just don’t seem to go your way; when no matter how hard you try?  And regardless of how long you try those things, all you seem to hear is no, no, and more nos.  When this happens, I’m sure you’ve often said the same thing that I’ve said time and time again… what did I do wrong?

As humans we often equate the denial of something yearned for with the idea that somehow we are being punished for some not-so-good choice we made somewhere in our past.  We live in a very task-based society, one that praises those of us who are doing something, versus those of us who expect something to happen. And rightfully so.  You can’t get anything or anywhere without doing something!  But what if I were to tell you that sometimes, your choice to do something doesn’t mean anything?  Gasp!  I know right.  If you are a type-A like myself, this can be defeating to hear.  How can we get anywhere by not doing anything?  It’s simple really.  So simple, that our crazy little human minds often make it more complicated so that it somehow makes more sense to us.

The answer is faith.  That’s it, really.  You have to have faith.  I believe that we are put on this Earth for a reason, and regardless of what that reason is, or how trivial it might seem to us, God has a plan that is bigger than you and me.  It’s crazy just to try to even imagine what He’s got brewing for you.  But it has to be known that faith is the only thing that is going to keep you afloat when all else seems lost.  It’s super easy to let go and give up when things don’t go your way.  It’s more challenging to have faith that things will work out and will be awesome, even when your life might seem at its bleakest right now.

I believe that when we are going through our hardest, most challenging, darkest times, God is getting ready to do something big.  That’s the way it  goes.  It’s not enough for things to always come easy for us, for if it did, we’d bore quickly.  And so God lets us experience slowdowns and disappointments on our way to achieving our purpose because first, it gives us a story.  It gives us the experience we need to reach out to others.  We are called to serve our fellow man, and regardless of what your dream is, serivce will more than likely be the outcome, intended or non-intended.  People long for a story because it helps them connect to the world around them, to somehow make sense of it.  Struggling also enables you to evolve.  You are no good staying the same.  God made you to be a dynamic creature, one that is able to bend and change over time to meet your needs and wants.  When you struggle, you are forced to look at yourself and make the changes necessary to achieve what you are longing for.  It also helps you see things from a new perspective.  Perhaps you thought you wanted something, but because of your struggle, you now see that it was something else that was meant for you.  And that something else turned out to be a whole lot better than whatever you thought you needed.

We are only human; we are not meant to understand the vastness and the greatness of our Creator.  But he knows you through and through.  He understands you more than you could ever understand him.  And best of all, He loves you.  This means that he’s not always going to give you everything you want when you want it or when you think you should have it.  If you are a parent, then you know this to be true.  Just because our child might beg and plead for something, he or she will not always get his or her way because well, you are the parent.  You will always know and want what’s best for your child, even if it means sometimes saying no, not now.  Our God is the same.  He knows what’s best for you, and He made you to be your best self, to live your best life.  And sometimes that means denial.

But don’t fret.  You are not being punished, my friend.  For if you have faith, and simply just surrender control, things will get better. You will start to see things differently for the first time and it won’t be all that bad.  When we are able to stop and draw closer, relax more, and truly say “que sera sera” and mean it, life just becomes more enjoyable, our purpose becomes clearer, and we begin to understand that just because it hasn’t happened yet, doesn’t mean it won’t.  You just have to find joy in the wait.

Waiting is not a punishment, it’s the preparation for the miracle that’s about to take place in your life.


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